For the Teabag in All of Us

Not that kind of teabag. Don't be gross.

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Location: South Florida, United States

If I go about this properly, the blog will (eventually) explain enough about me, so let me just explain the blog, or at least the title of it, here:

"A woman is like a teabag. You never know how strong she is until you put her in hot water."
--Eleanor Roosevelt

Sunday, January 14, 2007


I'll preamble this by saying that good heavens NO, I am not cheating on Chulo (or pondering doing so) and he is not cheating on me (or pondering doing so). But we did rent a movie last weekend that really disturbed me and got me thinking.

Have any of you seen The Last Kiss? I remember watching the trailer during the coming attractions for at least one movie, several months ago, and thinking that I would hatehateHATE that movie. But it got pretty good reviews, and I love Jacinda Barrett, so I thought, ok... let's see. How bad could it be?


What a shitty, depressing film. Seriously, one of the reviews called this the ultimate date movie. Are you fucking kidding me?? "Hey let's go out for a while. It might get serious, but then one of us will wonder if the grass is really greener and cheat on the other. Won't that be fun?" Um, no.

I mean, if you're in love, you're in love, right? If you're with someone and you know you want to wake up with that person for every anniversary, birthday, sick day, bad hair day... what else is there? When did we become so obsessed with the next best thing that the current best thing has stopped being good enough?

I won't ruin it for anyone who wants to see it and hasn't yet (not that I've left much to the imagination at this point -- sorry), but I found that film infuriating. And the really infuriating thing about it is, I imagine that's how it happens in real life. It just takes a moment... a complimentary word, an alternative ending, a glimpse of what might never be. I sat through most of this movie fuming, cursing at the television, and just generally in a foul temper. I was mad at him. I was REALLY mad at the girl. So mad that I will probably never be able to watch any other movie that she's in and see her as anything but a pathetic, whorebag homewrecker. Chulo asked me more than once to just forget the movie and let's do something else. But I had to see the ending. Which, although touching, still left me with a feeling of too little too late. A week later, I'm still annoyed. Seriously, the only thing that's good about this movie is the soundtrack.

And then, as if that movie and its ridiculous message isn't enough ...all I have to do is turn on the radio in the car. Pop/rock flavour of the month is this horrible, horrible song ... I heard one DJ call it "Ode to Adultery," which is precisely what it is. "Lips of an Angel." Seriously? Why is it okay to make music like this? YOUNG KIDS are listening to -- nay, memorising -- these asinine lyrics. What a fantastic message.

I'm not sure why I take all of this so seriously but I really find it upsetting. Does monogamy and fidelity mean nothing anymore? And if not, when did it stop meaning something?

In other news, I've lost the little cord that connects iPod to the computer. If only I could find it, perhaps I could do the iPod meme and grace the blogosphere with a more uplifting post, eh?


Blogger terry said...

i've only heard that idiotic song a couple of times (we have no top 40 radio stations here) and i absolutely despise it, largely for the same reason.

and it does seem that so many people are always so busy looking for what else is out there that they don't seem to realize what they have.

1/15/2007 02:07:00 PM  
Blogger buddha_girl said...

That Jacinda chick was on the Real World some time ago and would never let anyone forget that she was a MODEL in Australia...of what sort, I have no idea.

When I realized she was in Ladder 49, it RUINED the movie for me...even though my hottie Joachim (sp?) was also in it.

Cheating bitch all the way around.

And people who cheat? Don't get me started. Excellent rant. Glad you hung on to the anger long enough to bloggy about it! Good woman!

1/15/2007 05:14:00 PM  
Blogger Amy said...

THE LAST KISS was horrible. I tried to watch it with 4 of my friends and after about 10 minutes of it, we all looked at each other, nodded, and switched to a DVD that had Antonio Banderas teaching swing dancing to urban high schoolers. Much better. But only because of Antonio.

I'm head over heels for Clive Owen, but I must say his one movie CLOSER? What was that?? First, Jude Law gets with Natalie Portman then he gets with Julia Roberts but somehow gets her together with Clive Owen and then gets back together with her and she leaves Clive Owen and Clive Owen TRIES to get together with Natalie Portman but then Natalie gets back with Jude and Julia goes back to Clive....AAAAAAAGH!

My brain almost exploded.

If Clive hadn't been in it, I would have switched that DVD out, too.

There was something else important I wanted to comment on, but I'm all cheated out now. Sorry. But I dig your blog. I'll be back. :-)

1/15/2007 05:32:00 PM  
Blogger JMai said...

Terry -- It's depressing! (both the song and the attitude). Here's to changing it.

BG -- Actually Jacinda wasn't the cheater in the movie, she was the cheatee. I remembered her from Real World, but never watched it enough to dislike her (or anyone from that show, other than that creepy guy with P name... what was it? Puck? Pung? Something.)

Amy -- Thanks for stopping by, what a great comment. I felt the same way about Closer, and only saw it through because Clive was in it and he is so very delicious! Come back soon and finish that thought!

1/15/2007 08:20:00 PM  
Blogger Natalia said...

I have not seen that but it's on my list of movies to see. I guess you could say the same about a lot of movies. Some people were infuriated about Closer and that's one of my favourite movies ever. You know I believe in monogamy but I do think that it's all a little more complicated than knowing you want to wake up next to that person the rest of your life. Even if you do, there are good times and bad and people that make you wonder...even if you, at the end, will do nothing because you love your partner. Denying that those things happen is just prentending. But of course some people take it to the next level. Surely, there are people who are settling...and know they are settling. There are people who are confused about their feelings. There are people who have not found what they are looking for but what they think they should be loking for. If it were simple, there would be no books, movies, songs, etc. about how complicated love can get. As I said, I have not see the film. But I reckon if it deals with people and their fucked-up worlds, it will be something I'll want to watch.


1/15/2007 10:05:00 PM  
Blogger Rebecca said...

As ateacher, it is amazing that some of my students turn out as well as they do, after I have met or spoken to their parents. We are all a product of our environment. IF we give our kids, (neices, nephews, neighbors) the ability to know right from wrong and the positive and negative effects our/their decision have on others. We might actually equip them with the opportunity to make good decisions, like what music and movies to watch.

Ok, i'm off my preaching stand.
Hope you enjoy your Tuesday.

1/16/2007 09:42:00 AM  
Blogger Cressida said...

the thing is, some people freak out when things start getting solid. they think: is this it? forever? my life is never going to change again... all that fun I've been having is over.
So they freak out and do stupid shit.
When in reality, as Zach realized, marriage and family is an exciting adventure unto itself. and if you have someone great to do it all with you're lucky. It's just a movie about what late 20's couple go through before marriage sometimes... but yeah, NOT a date movie.

1/16/2007 11:23:00 PM  
Blogger buddha_girl said...

Ha! If someone needs to be cheated on, Jacinda is my FIRST CHOICE! Woo hoo!

Creepy guy on the Real World: Puck. He would pick his nose and then dip the offending finger into the peanutbutter immediately following the great DIG. How nasty?

1/17/2007 01:31:00 PM  
Blogger JMai said...

Butt -- I hear what you're saying. I know it's not as black and white as I'd like it to be. But I am frustrated and disappointed in the carelessness with which some people treat their relationships. And I'm disgusted with the people who allow and encourage it to happen. It's just disheartening.

It definitely is a movie about people and their fucked-up worlds. I'm not saying it was a bad film as in poor writing or acting or whatever. I am just disappointed with the premise. Because it CAN happen, that easily. And the idea of that is not a reality I appreciate.

Rebecca -- Teachers always get my appreciation and admiration. I don't know how you guys deal with allllll those kids, and they're not even yours! But I bet it starts to feel like they are, after a while. Preach away -s-

Cress -- You're right, Zach figures it all out in the end. But ugh -- the part where he hasn't quite figured it out yet -- MAKES ME WANT TO KILL HIM.

I guess I might be able to relate better if I'd gotten married at that age or even a little younger. Not that I'm married now, but you get my drift!

BG -- You meanie!! And yes, Puck was it. Ugh, he was disgusting!

1/18/2007 07:11:00 AM  

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